It’s been a crazy week … I just started a new role, had a few gigs to attend & I spent my grandpa’s last days with him.  It never gets easier … Losing grandparents hurts, despite them dying of old age.  As sad as I am writing this, I know that my Lolo is in a great place, with my Lola, his brothers & sisters & my Tito Jun.  & that thought brings such a smile to my face.

My Lolo … Gosh … What can I say.  He was everything that a charming gentleman is.  The ladies loved him.  The men were in awe of him; he was the man.  When my Lolo was still walking, he would wear the flyest 3-piece suits, leather loafers & he would always wear a hat.  He would never forget his hat.  & gosh he looked so handsome.  He was a slow walker (because he had a big stomach), but it was like a non-arrogant strut.  But he had every right to strut, because … He was the man.

Lolo loved to sing.  He had such a strong opera-esque voice that carried across the room.  Everyone used to cheer when Lolo would sing because he just sounded amazing.  You can say that I got my love of singing from his side of the family.  Not only was he a great singer, but he was so cheeky & had a play on words. Even in his last days, he was so cheeky!  Making all of the nurses laugh.  Gosh, the nurses were so sad to see him go.  Because he put a smile on everyone’s face.  He was that person.  He could make you so happy by just talking to him.  & I’m going to miss talking to him & seeing his reaction when I would tell him my stories.

My fondest memories of my Lolo would be him picking me up from kindergarten.  He would walk to my kinder & he would be waiting for me & I would run to him.  & we would walk home, Lola would be at home, cooking food.  & then I would have naps with Lolo & Lola.  We would always wake up in time to watch Wheel of Fortune & we would eat oranges.

Lolo was dedicated to the Lord & he even published, I guess you could say his review of the Catholic bible.  When he had it published, I brought a copy to school & I knew that my teachers were like “da fuq?!”, but I was proud as punch.  To me, he was my idol.  I held him such high regard.  I always will.

I will forever be grateful that my Lolo was proud of me.  He was proud when I graduated from high school.  He was proud when I graduated from university.  He was really proud that I was working full-time in a great job.  & he was super proud of me when I moved to the States.  He really was so happy for me.  I cried when I left because I just didn’t want anything to happen to both my Lolo & Lola in my absence.  Thankfully, I came home just in time before my Lola’s passing & I got to spend time with my Lolo.  Just last Friday, Lolo said that he was so proud of me for getting a great job.  It made me so happy that he felt that way.

My Lolo felt like he was on the mend a few weeks before his death.  & a part of me felt like he was improving too.  But then his health took a turn for the worst.  So we celebrated his birthday early as we didn’t think he couldn’t hang on for another 2 weeks for his actual birthday on the 26th April.  He was in high spirits, he ripped open his present, ate food & blew out his birthday candles.  Though he was weak, he was happy.  & if he did pass soon, then I knew that he ended his life on a great note.  & thankfully, he did end his life on a great note.

To me, my Lolo fought all the way to the end.  He will always be in my heart & I hope that he will watch over me throughout the rest of my days on this Earth.  I miss him so much but I know that we will be reunited one day.

I dedicate Frank Ocean’s “There Will Be Tears” to my Lolo.  You don’t understand how much this song is my song for Lolo.  He is just how Frank describes his grandpa.  I love you so much, Lolo.  You’re in a great place & not suffering.  Send my love to everyone above for me.  ‘Til we see each other again …  xo